TIMING IS EVERYTHING

 

By Buffy Lawson
Being in the music business for two hundred and forty three years, I have learned that if I want to “pitch” a song that I have written to an artist, manager, producer or record label…I choose a Friday afternoon meeting. Period. Monday morning would be a disaster because the decision maker is preoccupied with a mound of responsibilities for the week. And in the music business, by Friday afternoon the person is likely to be ready for a Coors Light, thus my chances are exponentially better. The environment is stress free and therefore the person is open to creativity. My baby song might be placed!!!
TIMING is everything, so it has been said, and I adamantly believe this is true. Relationships are no different. Recognizing this reality and adhering to a slight tweak in approach could move mountains in the love world as well. However, it does require biting of the tongue and self control because it is human nature to wish to deal with an issue RIGHT NOW! At least for me.
I confess this is particularly challenging for me because I am not a “game player” in relationships…nor a “pouter” or a “let me be mad long enough for you to get a clue and let you “figure this out on your own” kinda gal. I prefer dealing with a situation straight forward and have a difficult time faking being peachy when I am not. When I’m not feeling peachy, I’m not peachy.
But time after time I have been reminded by the universe that if I wish to get actual results, I should wait for a good time to discuss my issues. Let me display two scenarios as an example:
Scenario 1 
Mister Man has had a horrid week. Everything at work is haywire, the transmission has gone out in his car and the AC unit in the house needs to be replaced. The dog escaped, he fell off of his diet and dropped his phone in the…well, a pretty crappy place. 
He comes home, clearly snarky and VERY stressed out. 
Before he even changes from his black slacks into his jammies I light in, “So, babe. We really need to talk. This is very important.” Long pause… “Ok, what’s up?” he replies…clearly not wanting to engage but fearful not too. “I think we should have a…BABY!!!” GULP. 
Scenario 2 
Mister Man has had a horrid week. Everything at work is haywire, the transmission has gone out in his car and the AC unit in the house needs to be replaced. The dog escaped, he fell off of his diet and dropped his phone in the…well, a pretty crappy place. 
He comes home, clearly snarky and VERY stressed out. 
Mister Man and I are having a nice chilled glass of wine on the dock of our friends’ lake houseboat. I am laughing at his goofy jokes and he strokes my hair telling me how beautiful I am and how much he’s missed me while being so busy. I talk to him about his stresses and he makes me feel comforted about mine. I then plop the big one… “I think we should have a….BABY!!!”
For the record, we are not having a baby (unless he has one). But regardless, if you are breaking huge news of that gravity, or being irritated by the toilet seat being consistently left up…choose the right time to make your point.
It is the loving thing to do. And you are much more likely to get the results you are looking for!

 


Posted on 2014-11-05 by
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